Sing You Home
One sunny, crisp Saturday in September when I was seven years old, I watched my father drop dead. I was playing with my favorite doll on the https://www.canadagoose-jackets-online.com stone wall that bordered our driveway while he mowed the lawn. One minute he was mowing, and the next, he was facefirst in the grass as the mower propelled itself in slow motion down the hill of our backyard.
I thought at first he was sleeping, canada goose clearance or canada goose clearance sale playing a game. But when I crouched beside him on the lawn, his eyes were still open. Damp cut grass stuck to his forehead.
Canada Goose Jackets I don remember calling for my mother, but I must have. Canada Goose Jackets
Canada Goose Parka When I think about that day, it is in slow motion. The mower, walking alone. The carton of milk my mother was carrying when she ran outside, which dropped to the tarred driveway. The sound of round vowels as my mother screamed into the phone to give our address to the ambulance. Canada Goose Parka
buy canada goose jacket My mother left me at the neighbor house while she went to the hospital. The neighbor was an old woman whose couch smelled like pee. She offered me chocolate covered peppermints that were so old the chocolate had turned white at the edges. When her telephone rang I wandered into the backyard and crawled behind a row of hedges. In the soft mulch, I buried my doll and walked away. buy canada goose jacket
My mother never noticed that it was gone then, it barely buy canada goose jacket seemed that she acknowledged my father being gone, either. She never cried. She stood canada goose coats stiff backed through my father funeral. She sat across from me at the kitchen table that I still sometimes set with a third place for my father, as we gradually ate our way through canada goose deals chipped beef casserole and mac canada goose outlet and cheese and franks, sympathy platters from my father colleagues and neighbors who hoped food could make up for the fact that they didn know what to say. When a Canada Goose Parka robust, healthy forty buy canada goose jacket cheap two year old dies of a massive heart attack, the grieving family is suddenly contagious. Come too close, and you might catch our bad luck.
uk canada goose outlet Six months after my father died, my mother stoic his suits and shirts out of the closet they shared and brought them to Goodwill. She asked the liquor store for boxes, and she packed away the biography that he had been reading, which had been on the nightstand all this time; and his pipe, and his coin collection. She did not pack away his Abbott and Costello videos, although she always had told my father that she never really understood what made them funny. uk canada goose outlet
My mother carried these boxes to the attic, a place that seemed to trap cluster flies and heat. On her third trip up, she didn come back. Instead, what floated downstairs was a silly, fizzy refrain piped through the speakers of an old record player. I could not understand all the words, but it had something to do with a witch doctor telling someone how to win the heart of a girl.
Canada Goose online Ooo eee ooo ah ah, ting tang, walla walla, bing bang, I heard. It made a laugh bubble Canada Goose Jackets up in my chest, and since I hadn laughed all that much lately, I hurried to the source. Canada Goose online
When I stepped into the attic, I found my mother weeping. record, she said, playing it over again. made him so happy.
canada goose uk black friday I knew better than to ask why, then, she was sobbing. Instead, I curled up beside her and listened to the song that had finally given my mother permission to cry. canada goose uk black friday
Every life has Canada Goose Outlet a soundtrack.
canada goose uk shop There is a tune that makes me think of the summer I spent rubbing baby oil on my stomach in pursuit of the perfect tan. There another that reminds me of tagging along with my father on Sunday mornings to pick up the New York Times. There the song that reminds me of using fake ID to get into a nightclub; and the one that brings back my cousin Isobel sweet sixteen, where I played Seven Minutes in Heaven with a boy whose breath smelled like tomato soup. canada goose uk shop
canada goose uk outlet If you ask me, music is the language of memory. canada goose uk outlet
cheap canada goose uk Wanda, the shift nurse Canada Goose online at Shady Acres Assisted Living, canada goose black friday sale hands me a visitor pass, although I been coming to the nursing home for the past year to work with various clients. is he today? I ask. cheap canada goose uk
canada goose store usual, Wanda says. from the chandelier and entertaining the masses with a combination of tap dancing and shadow puppets. canada goose store
canada goose clearance sale I grin. Mr. Docker is in the final throes of dementia. In the twelve months I been his music therapist, he interacted with me twice. Most of the time, he sits in his bed or a wheelchair, staring through me, completely unresponsive. canada goose clearance sale
canada goose factory sale When I tell people I am a music therapist, they think it means I play guitar for people who are in the hospital I a performer. Actually, I more like a physical therapist, except instead of using treadmills and grab bars as canada goose tools, I use music. When I tell people that, they usually dismiss my job as some New Age BS. canada goose factory sale
canada goose coats In fact, it very scientific. In brain scans, music lights up the medial prefrontal cortex and triggers a memory that starts playing in your mind. All of a sudden you can see a place, a person, an incident. The strongest responses to music ones that elicit vivid memories the greatest activity on brain scans. It for this reason that stroke patients can access lyrics before they remember language, why Alzheimer patients can still remember songs from their youth. canada goose coats
And why I haven given up on Mr. Docker yet.
canada goose black friday sale for the warning, I tell Wanda, and I pick up my duffel, my guitar, and my djembe. canada goose black friday sale
Canada Goose Online those down, she insists. not supposed to be carrying anything heavy. Canada Goose Online
buy canada goose jacket cheap I better get rid of this, I say, touching my belly. In my twenty eighth week, I canada goose coats on sale enormous I also completely lying. I worked way too hard to have this baby to feel like any part of the pregnancy is a burden. I give Wanda a wave and head down the hall to start today session. buy canada goose jacket cheap
Canada Goose Coats On Sale Usually my nursing home clients meet in a group setting, but Mr. Docker is a special case. A former CEO cheap Canada Goose of a Fortune 500 company, he now lives in this very chic elder care facility, and his daughter Mim contracts my services for weekly sessions. He just shy of eighty, has a lion mane of white hair and gnarled hands that apparently used to play a mean jazz piano. Canada Goose Coats On Sale
canada goose coats on sale The last time Mr. Docker gave any indication that he was aware I shared the same physical space as him was two months ago. I been playing my guitar, and he smacked his canada goose store fist against the handle of his wheelchair twice. I am not sure if he wanted to chime in for good measure or was trying to canadian goose jacket tell me to stop he was in rhythm. canada goose coats on sale
canada goose I knock and open the door. Docker? Canada Goose sale I say. Zoe. Zoe Baxter. You feel like playing a little music? canada goose
Someone on staff has moved him to an armchair, where he sits looking out the window. Or maybe just through it not focusing on anything. His hands are curled in his lap like lobster claws.
uk canada goose I say briskly, trying to maneuver myself around the bed and the television stand and the table with his untouched breakfast. should we sing today? I wait a beat but am not really expecting an answer. Are My Sunshine I ask. Waltz I try to extract my guitar from its case in a small space beside the bed, which is not really big enough for my instrument and my pregnancy. Settling the guitar awkwardly on top of my belly, I start to strum a few chords. Then, on second thought, I put it down uk canada goose.